This story, along with another by me, appeared on weirdyear.com back in 2011. I'm glad to see they're still around.
By Scott D. Hughey
A matter transporter could revolutionize life as we know it on the planet. Or, it could be used to play immature pranks, such as transporting me to work. Convenient? Yes, except I was drying off after a shower at the time.
"Honest boss, an alien did this to me." The conversation got awkward after that. When I got home, the alien was still laughing.
I always assumed if aliens visited here, they’d either take the planet over or save us from ourselves. It never occurred to me they’d be such jerks.
The sooner he goes back to Earth, the better.